Instead of

Blogging has not been my thing this month. I’m not in training, so not much to write there unless you all want to hear about my weekly, boring, and primarily on treadmill runs. I’m crazy busy at work, but so thankful to finally have a new department head. When I’m at home, I just want to be at home. No more computers. Instead of blogging about my life, I’ve just been doing life.

Last week Josh, Ella and I had dinner with old college friends. A dinner that involved a toddler, a baby, two dogs, and a group of us that are all married, or practically married, more food than beer and lots of laughs.

I took a break from my cubicle and met my friend Rache for a mid-week lunch so we could catch up on all of the excitement of her buying a new house. This weekend I spent a lovely afternoon at her new house, with our friend Thalia and the tornado known as Ella.

It’s not until I have a week like this, with friends, that I realize just how much I miss them. Life gets busy, we all know that, but when did it get so busy that we go months in-between fun things like spending time with good friends?

Life changed when we had Ella, we can’t fly by the seat of our pants as much anymore. Before making plans with friends, I have to make sure that Josh will be able to do daddy-duty and he has to do the same. Unless we have a sitter, doing dinner too far from home is out of the question, because Ella staying up too late leads to a horrible night’s sleep for the entire house. Going out to bars is no longer my idea of a great time. Sure I love beer and good wine, but not to excess. Hangovers are too brutal.

Sometimes we are the forgotten friends. There were moments this week when I felt like we were totally excluded. Not that we have to be included all the time, but when they were talking about a gift exchange they did and a cruise they all went on (granted I had just given birth), dinners they had been at when someone suddenly asked about Josh and I, it was hard not to feel twings of sadness. That’s when I just smile and nod. Laugh politely as if we had been a part of all the things they were talking about. 

Some of it may be that we live about 45 minutes north of our friends. Friends that all moved to Denver after school and started their grown up lives together. Part of it may be that we had kids before everyone else. Different place in life, different lifestyles. There are days when I mourn the loss of friends, especially one in particular who was one of my best friends in college, who hasn’t even met Ella. I could blame different things, or we can try to change it.

I’m going to with changing it.

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